Something I've been learning the hard way over the last couple of months is not to discuss my feelings/emotions while I'm still processing them. I've made some very hurtful statements that end up not even in the least reflecting how I really feel about the situation, but because I'm new at dealing with intense emotions, I can run through a whole gamut of feelings as a reaction before I settle on what clicks in my brain as my real feelings (and it ends up usually agreeing with what my logical side tells me makes sense). This has caused the wasted expense of a lot of energy. I've tried to set a subconscious "governor" on my mouth, and am working on actively thinking about engaging it, especially when I feel the rush accompanied by an intense emotional reaction. I'm not perfect yet (far from it), but I'm improving. I think the idea of making totally private LJ posts as an outlet in your case is a great idea. Maybe you don't even have to do it on LJ for fear of mis-marking a post and having others read it. Keep a password-protected text document somewhere. Use a paper journal. Whatever...
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Date: 2003-03-05 10:05 am (UTC)