I'm sick of guarding others' boundaries preemptively. Caretaking is for sick family members, only. Temporarily. I'd owe you a favor if you kick me whenever I start doing this.

Why do I have this urge to play The Frantic's "Ti Kwan Leap" skit here?

I'm going to declare my independence, redefine my self-concept internally instead of desperately looking for external validation, and give everyone collectively an upraised middle finger. I'm a good, worthwhile person whether anyone else says so, notices, or approves of me generally. Live with it.

I'm glad that you're trying more to take your own feelings as just as important as other peoples. It's an important step.