Getting soft...

[jay]

Feh. Once upon a time, I frequented Usenet and local mailing lists, was involved in various discussions, and knew how to defend myself. Ideas were filtered several times before posting. Weaknesses were studied, anticipating possible challenges or lines-of-attack. Nits that could be seized on by net.nuisances were carefully combed out, especially spelling. Statements were personally qualified to avoid generalizations, sometimes redundantly-so in the same sentence.

Then came LJ... and I've gotten soft, and sloppy. Not on my toes, not as careful about attack-angles or spelling (or missing clauses!). After all, the folks on one's LJ reader list are called friends, and they tend to be a bit more sympathetic, supportive and are self-selected.

But on Usenet and broad mailing lists, it's still harsh out there... not only are the random readers not my friends, they may be overtly hostile, looking for opportunities to throw scorn and snideness in my direction. I've re-learned this the hard way over the past week or so. If I'm going to spend significant time and energy in those forums, I have to get back in my older, harder mindset.

Comments

I guess I'm just the opposite

[oakdragon.livejournal.com]

For me, this medium is about connection as much as the sharing of ideas. I tend to prefer the environments where I can be open about who I am and not have to be on-guard. Yes, from time to time, it leaves me open to hurt, but to me, that's the risk I'm willing to take. I don't want to set up barriers and artificial personas.

I've often felt that online communication has fostered to main types. Those, like me, who found that the lack of face to face allowed one to drop the façades and allow me to be more connected. Perhaps it could be seen as community connection over the individual ego. For others, the medium creates a separation and it becomes more of an intellectual exercise. Perhaps this one could be seen as the indivitual ego over community connection. I know I've gotten some flamage with acusations that I'm advocating the suppression of the individual for the sake of the group, but that's not true IMHO. I've been amazed and a bit disheartened to see how these ego conflicts arise in lists centered on spiritual connections.

If I will adapt my mode, it will be to try to take into account the way the other listens, to make sure that I'm being heard and understood.

BTW, I noticed I've slipped off your friends list again.

Re: I guess I'm just the opposite

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

That's a useful breakout -- I'd go further and say that LJ tends to foster more community connection,in my experience (counter-intuitive for a collection of individual journals), while say, sfbay-poly is dominated by gamesmanship, intellectual posturing and flames. Alt.poly strangely seems more of a community to me that sfbay-poly, despite the geographical separation of the former.

As far as LJ lists go, a few months ago I had removed several journals that appeared inactive... yours is now back.

My inactivity

[oakdragon.livejournal.com]

Yes, I tend to initiate very few posts, but I do read and respond on a fairly regular basis.