jay: (contemplative)
jay ([personal profile] jay) wrote2004-10-22 08:37 am

Outside the village...

I'm frankly envious of parents with community support... for example, [personal profile] dawnd and [personal profile] akienm are able to find a series of sitters for Allegra so that they could go to a weekend workshop in LA. Without having to, say, fly in Dawn's mother from back East... it's great for them, and I think they'll add a lot to that workshop. But I know that I couldn't do the same thing, and that Pat and I are pretty much on our own as far as child-raising goes... no net, here. When crises have hit, my only option has been to fly in one or the other grandmothers for a while, and/or take vacation time and stay home as well.

Still, that's a natural consequence of not being a part of any particular community, other than sort of tolerated on the fringes... I have only myself to reproach, arguably, for not giving enough or conforming sufficiently.

[identity profile] brian1789.livejournal.com 2004-10-23 01:40 am (UTC)(link)
No, no partners came to sit with the kids. Or friends. Only Pat's mother, for four weeks, and I handled all of the arrangements. But a couple of friends brought over meals while Pat was in the hospital, and Dalton came over once and kept Pat company. That was still more help then than Pat got from our church community, granted...

(remembers when Pat ruptured and bled all over the floor, or having to clean 8" deep incisions while watching kids... *shudder*)

And the evidence doesn't support your analysis, I think.

[identity profile] tenacious-snail.livejournal.com 2004-10-23 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
my mistake...I somehow had thought that you'd had sweeties come in to do childcare.

you've obviously got access to much more evidence than I do.

geekchick: (Default)

[personal profile] geekchick 2004-10-23 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
I thought N. had come in to help out for a while?

[identity profile] brian1789.livejournal.com 2004-10-23 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
No, not for kid-sitting or around Pat's surgery. But N. did spend a week here in the summer of 2003 helping me do kitchen renovation. :)