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Nov. 16th, 2004 06:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jayOne minor difference between last night and previous instances was that instead of feeling undesir-able and inherently unworthy of inclusion -- that it was about *my* shortcomings, I felt like I was OK. But felt like my gifts were undesir-ed and unappreciated -- that it was about *them*, the group's choices in that context. I was at least as cranky as I was depressed, if not more so. Maybe I'm beating a proverbial dead horse over a trivial episode, but the small parsing difference is significant to me (and maybe shows that some of the HAI reprogramming is sticking ;). And I'm reasonably cheerful today, not obsessing on last night's setback (also an improvement over the past :).
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Yes Yes Yes
Date: 2004-11-17 07:32 am (UTC)Your statement that it wasn't inheently about your worth, that it was about the group's desires and choices really is one of the primary messages that HAI tries to get across, so workshop seems to have stuck so far, at least on this one particular point. There were many things that stuck for me in Level 1 that have in some ways faded, however the more I interact with life and other HAI community members the more I am reminded of those lessons and insights.
Lots of hugs, T