(no subject)
One minor difference between last night and previous instances was that instead of feeling undesir-able and inherently unworthy of inclusion -- that it was about *my* shortcomings, I felt like I was OK. But felt like my gifts were undesir-ed and unappreciated -- that it was about *them*, the group's choices in that context. I was at least as cranky as I was depressed, if not more so. Maybe I'm beating a proverbial dead horse over a trivial episode, but the small parsing difference is significant to me (and maybe shows that some of the HAI reprogramming is sticking ;). And I'm reasonably cheerful today, not obsessing on last night's setback (also an improvement over the past :).