My 2005 in review...
Dec. 31st, 2005 02:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jay1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
Been in agony in a foreign hospital, completely on my own. Discovered and named a river and a canyon. Participated in certain kinds of parties, and new kinds of play. Double-dates. One-footed spins and backwards 3-turns, skating. Nearly been in a plane crash. Went to a Yankees game. Tentatively embraced a local community, as a part rather than an observer. Had Pat's homemade alfredo sauce. Sang songs I didn't understand, arm-in-arm with people I didn't know, in a German beer hall lubricated by weissbier. Visited Hiroshima, Fukuoka, and drove a twisting one-lane highway (with two-directional truck traffic ;) through the Spanish Sierra Nevada to the ocean. Saw Moroccan villages, not just touristy parts of Tangier. Stood on the rim of an active volcano. Used a flogger as a prop in a work meeting (for MARTE). Was dumped by someone for the third time. Went to a Japanese hot-spring (onsen) and bathed nude. Celebrated a 25th anniversary (dating Pat, on Halloween).
2. Did you keep your New Year's Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Exercise... a wash, about the same. Weight, no, I gained about 4 lbs during the year instead of losing 5. (grimace) At this point, I need to lose about 25 lbs to be at my actuarially-ideal weight, so this is becoming a problem.
But... I've largely stopped putting myself down... it only crops up now as an occasional defensive tactic. And I have done more fun activities with my kids, so yes on both of those. I had overnight dates, locally... and at the same time, have done less caretaking and generally continued to work together with Pat to improve our primary relationship.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes,
p3aches with A. in March :) 4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes... I lost my last remaining grandparent in September.
5. What countries did you visit?
US, Canada, Spain, France, Netherlands, Germany, Morocco, Japan. The UK, if one counts Gibraltar.
6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
Career/job stability, as NASA-Ames has been in crisis for the past year. But things will probably get worse before getting better. More winning research proposals. More LDR dates. Specifically, to find some common interests or activities with David. A weekend or trip somewhere one-on-one with
patgreene. and with geekchick. 7. What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
1/25, when I got the bad news about my father's illness. 5/7, a gathering that had been preceded by two months of argument, but ended in a lovely surprise. 9/9, I was stricken and hospitalized in Munich, with a kidney stone. 9/28, my grandmother's death.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Work-wise, successful field tests of automated drilling in the Arctic (July) and remote simulated Mars lander drilling operations from Spain (September). Relationship-wise, rebuilding and growing with
patgreene, while at the same time seeing tenacious_snail locally. Family-wise, being able to communicate and interact significantly with James, despite him being 15 ;). 9. What was your biggest failure?
Time management, negotiating and balancing... I kept causing problems with unilateral decisions, not asking for things, last-minute disclosures, and generally not being a partner at times, or negotiating very well. Particularly with
patgreene about balancing time with family, her and with other commitments (work, other relationships and social events). 10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Heh. Yes, I was struck down with a kidney stone while in Germany. Three shots of demerol and one of morphine only dulled the pain a bit. Not something I ever want to repeat...
11. What was the best thing someone bought you?
Hmmm... I'd have to say a blue sparkly party shirt, given for my birthday by
dawnd and akienm. It was flashy and bold and shiny and something that I want to grow into... :)12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My mother
twoglass for supporting my father in his ongoing illness. patgreene for repeatedly demonstrating her love and affection and patience and forgiveness. House Weirdness and the Observatory and others for taking a chance and persistence, over the past two years. grynz for staying with me when I was incapacitated and vomiting...13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The guys in the front office, i.e. this administration. Repeatedly... they seem to keep finding new lows. The terrible cook in base camp on Devon Island.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Mortgage payments, medical bills, utilities and taxes. Everything else was minor.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Exploring. Exploring new places, unvisited by humans-in-general as well as unvisited by me. Exploring new ways of relating to other people. Exploring what we can do in future planetary missions to find ice and maybe life. Exploring communication and linguistic differences. Exploring dear friends and sweeties and partners and what they like and do...
James's jokes and shy cynical earnestness. David's awakening to other people around him. Kevin's moving from special-ed student to ahead of grade-level.
16. What song will always remind you of 2005?
"Accidentally In Love" by Counting Crows... not just because my sweeties kept surprising me this year, or being unexpectedly in love with several people... even a community or two... but also because it kept sticking in my head like the pop-meme it is.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?: happier. Lots of growth, and I'm stronger and see how I'm loved.
b) thinner or fatter? : fatter, by 4 pounds
c) richer or poorer? : richer, financially and in other ways :) Although it wasn't a bad idea to move most of my retirement nestegg into overseas index funds, which grew 14% this year...
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Written more proposals... exercised more during the long Arctic-Spain-Japan travel period. Managed household budgets. Asking for things I want or need. Spent time with my LDR sweeties. Finishing the kitchen remodel.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Retreating from others... being frustrated and feeling isolated... a bit less travel would have been nice. Railing about household details.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
In Atlanta at my parents' house... tracking down my mom in the hospital, taking over dinner, and napping the the rental car. And spending time with my father.
21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
Hmmm... close call between Nancy and
tenacious_snail.22. Did you fall in love in 2005?
I was in-love already, and with several deserving people. And have a couple of outstanding crushes. ;-)
23. How many one night stands?
Zero... I've never had a one-night stand, and am unlikely to do so... just too much overhead in a new contact, negotiating with my other partners, to be worth the effort for just a one-night fling with someone.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
Um... I didn't really watch broadcast or cable TV this year, myself. I don't think I turned on a set other than at someone else's request. As far as DVDs and such go... either "Coupling" or "Red Dwarf" episodes (thanks,
geekchick!).25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year
New enemies... no, I can't think of any. Some friends drifted away, but not to that point.
25. What was the best book you read?
Hmm... I didn't read much this year. Nothing stands out.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Hmm... arguably, Eddie from Ohio. Although I liked the Magnetic Fields, too... courtesy of
geekchick in both cases. :)28. What did you want and get?
Closure of some old issues, with my parents. Time and vacations spent with the kids. Feeling like a partner with Pat. Local overnights. Project successes. A place of my own, in my house.
29. What did you want and not get?
New projects. More face-time and cuddle-time with my LDRs. Peace. Completion of my kitchen remodeling...
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
March of the Penguins...
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
On Devon Island, running drilling field tests. Lots of work (three roundtrips to the drilling site), weather was sunny, and I had evidence of my friends, family and loved ones around me. Later I had a cake and letters from home... I was 45.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Hmm... better long-term work news?
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Matching colors, no holes or stains. More yellows and orange. And blue-shiny shirts...
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None, I ignore celebrities.
35. What kept you sane?
The patience and love of those around me. And lots of self-work, including two HAI levels.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Probably the recent revelations of unConstitutional actions by this government. Things will probably get worse before they get better.
37. Who do you miss?
I miss Nanny, my grandmother. I miss my father being healthy. I've gotten used to less ongoing interaction with
geekchick, but I still pine sometimes. JC reappeared, then disappeared again this year. 38. Who was the best new person you met?
"Best" sounds judgemental... impact-wise, probably close between
cyan_blue and inflectionpoint, so far... neither of whom I really knew a year ago. In some respects, I know my father more three-dimensionally and understand him better.39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005?
That abuse, and emotional damage and hot-buttons, propagates onward insidiously from generation to generation until one names it and consciously acts to counter its effects in interactions with children (and others).
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Heh. "Mommy's alright, Daddy's alright, they just seem a little weird.
Surrender, surrender, but don't give yourself away..." -- Surrender, Less Than Jake/Cheap Trick
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no subject
Date: 2005-12-31 11:11 pm (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 12:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-01 12:16 am (UTC)May I comment on this one?
That abuse, and emotional damage and hot-buttons, propagates onward insidiously from generation to generation until one names it and consciously acts to counter its effects in interactions with children (and others).
True. True indeed. But we can do better than was done for us. Not all the time, and not always as much better as we might wish, but we -can- do better. And those after us will do better still. We can do this.
I like the song you quoted.. yes to surrender and no to giving yourself away. Yes indeed.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 12:34 am (UTC)And I'm trying to do better. I'm not perfect... I make some mistakes. Just as my own parents made mistakes -- but I now have the advantage of being aware of what is/was propagating.
And yes, getting to know you has been a delight-filled process, laden with surprises. Which reminds me, we should put together the next BPC agenda soon...
no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 10:46 pm (UTC)Hugs and such to you and your family!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-03 06:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-01 01:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 12:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-01 02:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 12:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-01 02:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-02 12:38 am (UTC)your answer to question 3 sorta funny.
Date: 2006-01-01 08:59 pm (UTC)Re: your answer to question 3 sorta funny.
Date: 2006-01-02 12:39 am (UTC)Re: your answer to question 3 sorta funny.
Date: 2006-01-07 05:55 am (UTC)