Returns and volleys

[jay]

Working on my taxes, taking the morning off of work. I should get small refunds on both federal and state returns. Meanwhile, patgreene has taken the kids to the beach so I can have peace to get the taxes done.

Periodically, I've been trading posts yesterday and today with a few folks on a local mailing list known for its combativeness (sfbay-poly). Accused of whining, of talking too much, of being manipulative... if folks there are really that incensed by my communication style, I wish they'd just killfile me and go on.

When commenting in public posts on topics that are emotionally or ethically sensitive, I prefer to be oblique or indirect, even unclear. I've learned that if I speak openly and clearly on some issue on a mailing list or newsgroup, I lose control of my words -- they may be used by others against third parties, or even brought up against myself at some future date. If I instead use metaphor, obscure anecdotes or indirect counter-examples, I may be misunderstood... but at least I still have a line of defense, in that I can later dispute whatever interpretation someone else tries to apply to my ramblings.

And there's a certain puzzle-solving fun, too... watching to see who, if anyone, on a given group, will actually figure out what I'm trying to say (instead of rushing to knee-jerk reactions or simple interpretations). I suppose that's a bit arrogant, but otherwise I'm easily bored...

Comments

[greeklady.livejournal.com]

Translation (from the voices inside serene's head and nowhere else, necessarily): I am a weasel whose aim in "communicating" is to amuse myself rather than actually participating in conversation, and who doesn't have the courage to stand by anything he says.


I must have similiar voices...

Sorry Brian, I must also say I agree with this point. Stand up for what you believe in. It is much better than losing the respect of your peers.

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

It isn't a matter of bloody-mindedly standing for what I believe in -- there's adequate documentation of that in a Google search of alt.poly. This is more of an issue of being willing to throw out attitudes or beliefs that I don't necessarily believe in, for the sake of provoking discussion in some way. And perhaps of indirect vs. direct communications...

[sinboy.livejournal.com]

This is all fine and well if people know you're doing that. If they don't, it could lead people to have an impression of you that isn't true. I'm not sure how a good discussion is worth that.

[geekchick]

This is more of an issue of being willing to throw out attitudes or beliefs that I don't necessarily believe in, for the sake of provoking discussion in some way.

How is this different from trolling?

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

I'm not anonymously arriving, inciting a stir and leaving... these are forums where I've been for years and am reasonably recognized... and I've always stayed around and borne the consequences.

[geekchick]

I'm not anonymously arriving, inciting a stir and leaving...

I don't think the first or the last bits are necessarily required. My impression is that you seem to be stirring up shit merely for the purpose of doing so, posting things that you are well aware are inflammatory. Sarcasm does not translate well to text communications unless perhaps it's with someone who knows you very well; I think expecting a whole mailing list, usenet group, or journal audience to know when you're being sarcastic with nothing to go on other than the words you write is asking a little much.

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

So, what would you suggest?