Schrodinger's revenge

[jay]

Interesting to note how friends, partners, people-in-general shift during difficult periods... especially noteworthy when there's a sharp difference between gently chiding or supportive one-on-one discussions and a seemingly-harsher line taken by the same folks in public spaces. One senses attempts to play off both sides in a dispute... or perhaps an unwillingness to burn bridges.

Nonetheless, I've certainly noted who my friends have been -- and haven't been, at least not openly -- in this recent flap. Other folks say that they may like me, but they're unwilling to trust me unless I promise to communicate the manner they prefer? Fine, but that statement cuts two ways... my own trust-assessments have certainly been adjusted downward recently for some people, upward for others. The chestnut about difficult times differentiating between true friends and those posing as such has some validity, unfortunately. Likewise the one about Schrodinger's cat... containers have been opened. One way or the other...

Comments

Re: Noodle, schmoodle

[trinker.livejournal.com]

If you were still interested in trying to smooth the waves (I don't know that you should be, given that some might already be set in their attack stance), it might be helpful to calve off that first paragraph ("I can see....lab rats." ;) and put that in a separate journal entry.

Thank you for articulating that. It's that specific point that was getting to me, and I wasn't part of the mailing list discussion that spawned all this.

The part about "easily bored" not being about others' befuddlement is also a good clarification. You might bear in mind that playing with your expression, while enjoyable, can get in the way of clear communication. It's a lesson I had to learn, and learned badly, when I was in high school.

The shifts in style can lead to a sort of "cried wolf" thing, where people are less willing to work at understanding, because it's all going to change soon, anyway. I would hope that the enjoyment of a group discussion would come from the sensation of learning about others, and sharing one's own thoughts, rather than from the very self-contained joys of trying on expressive styles as if they were costumes.

Does this make sense to you?