Pushing boundaries

[jay]

My local parish has theoretically accepted me, as a poly person... but it appears that there are limits to their acceptance. There are a large number of governing board (vestry) vacancies this year. I served once before, about 6 years ago, so thought I'd offer my services again -- both to contribute something, and also because there was a handpicked slate that exactly matched the number of vacancies. I view rubber-stamp elections as undemocratic and bad for the long-term health of a given organization. So I put my name in over the weekend as a candidate.

I just received a phone call, trying to strongly discourage me from doing so because my "lifestyle choices are inappropriate for someone in a visible leadership role in our parish." Welcome to second-class-citizenship, eh? That, and one of the existing slate candidates will only stand in a noncompetitive election "because she doesn't want anyone's feelings to be hurt by losing." I've lost four previous vestry elections, no big deal for me. Other candidates belong to small study groups, or donate larger %s of their income, but those aren't official requirements.

In the bylaws, there are no grounds for preventing me from standing... unless the rector officially deems me not in good standing, but he'd have to document why and in writing. Not whispers. I'm tired of buying into my own invisibility in that body... either I'm loved and accepted as a full part, or not. I'm still an OK person, whether or not they can accept my "lifestyle choices."

Comments

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

Right... they could say I'm not in good standing, but then would they have to deny me communion and write a letter to the bishop explaining the reasons for their action. And the bishop is a lame-duck, and might enjoy taking a stance...

If I'm a member, I can run. If not, I can't. But I don't have to conspire in my own marginalization!