heads-up

[jay]

I am not in a very good state emotionally, due to a variety of reasons... things falling apart here at home, my father's ongoing illness, only one of nine proposals selected at work, social failures and the shaky status of most of my relationships. It is hard to see anything positive looming. This is a heads-up and advance apology if I'm overly whiny, depressed, self-pitying, envious of socially-favored friends, tense with suppressed/controlled emotion, or reverting to bad old self-deprecation. Don't pay attention to it, I'm just not well. And I may not ask very well, for awhile... when feeling worthless it is hard to justify bothering someone else.

Comments

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Particularly sorry to hear about the one of nice at work. *sigh* Just salt in the wound with so much else going on.

Whether or not you feel like it, you're still worthwhile.

(hugs)

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the reassurance. (smile) I'm better this week, I think. And I'm happy with myself to the extent that I recognize that those feelings don't equal reality, and can warn others accordingly.

Work-wise... there were 1300 brief proposals submitted, but only 135 chosen for full development... so 1/9 is still around average for the call. Not bad, but I'd vainly hoped for getting one of the ones picked with *my* name on it as the PI. (rueful chuckle)

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

I'd vainly hoped for getting one of the ones picked with *my* name on it as the PI. (rueful chuckle)

umm. Yeah. *wry smile*