Outside the village...

[jay]

I'm frankly envious of parents with community support... for example, dawnd and akienm are able to find a series of sitters for Allegra so that they could go to a weekend workshop in LA. Without having to, say, fly in Dawn's mother from back East... it's great for them, and I think they'll add a lot to that workshop. But I know that I couldn't do the same thing, and that Pat and I are pretty much on our own as far as child-raising goes... no net, here. When crises have hit, my only option has been to fly in one or the other grandmothers for a while, and/or take vacation time and stay home as well.

Still, that's a natural consequence of not being a part of any particular community, other than sort of tolerated on the fringes... I have only myself to reproach, arguably, for not giving enough or conforming sufficiently.

Comments

[tenacious-snail.livejournal.com]

um, its also a consequence of having three times as many children and living in a house where you don't host a lot of community events.

Speaking for myself, I don't offer to sit for kids until I have gotten an opportunity to know them. I have not, for example, offered to babysit for anyone other than y'all (but I did help other friends find sitters), as there aren't any kids that I've met more than twice.

I suspect that you *could* manage to arrange childcare through using your friends, though it might take more effort, again, because of the volume of kids (and 6 year age range). You might, for instance, have James spend the night with a friend one night, while a sitter came over for Kevin and David. I know Dawn has expressed a willingness to have Kevin stay over there, and that both Sarah and Dana have expressed a willingness to sit for your kids (as have I).

[brian1789.livejournal.com]

I doubt that I could simply pick up the phone, even in a crisis... maybe if I farmed-out each kid to a different family. And yes, I don't have a house where I can host events, which doesn't help the marginality issues.

[dancing-star.livejournal.com]

Our household has talked and in a crisis or even with enough planning we'd take all three of your boys, either by one of us going down or bringing the boys here.

What gets in the way is the distance we live apart.

Your family is more than welcome at any of the things we plan which include children. If Pat is alone and would like help with one or more of the boys, all she has to do is let us know. Else wise we'll assume the person who brought the child is doing fine.