Outside the village...
Oct. 22nd, 2004 08:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jayI'm frankly envious of parents with community support... for example, dawnd and akienm are able to find a series of sitters for Allegra so that they could go to a weekend workshop in LA. Without having to, say, fly in Dawn's mother from back East... it's great for them, and I think they'll add a lot to that workshop. But I know that I couldn't do the same thing, and that Pat and I are pretty much on our own as far as child-raising goes... no net, here. When crises have hit, my only option has been to fly in one or the other grandmothers for a while, and/or take vacation time and stay home as well.
Still, that's a natural consequence of not being a part of any particular community, other than sort of tolerated on the fringes... I have only myself to reproach, arguably, for not giving enough or conforming sufficiently.
dawnd and akienm are able to find a series of sitters for Allegra so that they could go to a weekend workshop in LA. Without having to, say, fly in Dawn's mother from back East... it's great for them, and I think they'll add a lot to that workshop. But I know that I couldn't do the same thing, and that Pat and I are pretty much on our own as far as child-raising goes... no net, here. When crises have hit, my only option has been to fly in one or the other grandmothers for a while, and/or take vacation time and stay home as well. Still, that's a natural consequence of not being a part of any particular community, other than sort of tolerated on the fringes... I have only myself to reproach, arguably, for not giving enough or conforming sufficiently.
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Date: 2004-10-23 08:31 pm (UTC)I wasn't reproaching myself about the church community... at the time, I was annoyed with them. Pat had put in hundreds of hours of volunteer work, taught classes, carried meals and visited others during crises... but when she had a tough time, the response was minimal for her. Granted, pastoral care is not a strong suit of that parish, but... I did wonder then if the lack of interest in helping Pat pertained to my being seen as too weird or strange, but dismissed the thought.