From my organizer page...

[jay]

"A first failure may prepare the way for future success." --Arnold Lobel

I know this to be true in science, and to some extent in engineering and business. I wonder how applicable it is in relationships, though... I've read some accounts that if one isn't successful in making a connection (of whatever sort) initially, the likelihood of future success falls off dramatically. Or does it?

Comments

[who-is-she.livejournal.com]

from my personal expereince:

1) a person can be filed for YEARS as "friend only" and can later become a love and a spouse
2) one can have horrendously unsuccessful relationships when they're younger, and really learn and grow from that, and make much better choices in the future. (one can also NOT grow, and make the same mistakes over and over...)
3) for me, first connections are rarely the deciding factor. THere is so much more of depth to learn about someone.. if you are actually going to try to relate to them deeply.
4) awkwardness in the initial stages of a relationsihp does not have to doom the union. What matters is how both parties react to the awkwardness. Withdrawal? Snide comments? Laughter? Giggling? Tears? Request for a "Do-over"? how we deal with our apparent failures does count.
5) I've learned tons from my mistakes. While they hurt like hell at the time, they also primed me to make better choices.

[p3aches.livejournal.com]

what she said. Hugs t